Your boss

Some of the things you should think about concerning your colleagues also apply to your boss. On one hand, you have no obligation to say what is wrong with you. On the other hand, it is likely that your boss already knows something is wrong.

But there is a difference between your colleagues and your boss. Your boss is very interested in ensuring that you are doing your job. If your quality of work are not up to mark for over a period of time, it is generally best to explain why. By doing this you will also ensure that you get the best backup and support. Your boss knows that you are normally a hard working and productive person. He or she will know what you are capable of.

Be careful not to take on a submissive role when you talk to your boss about your depression. It will be easier if:

• you say things straight out
• you avoid making unrealistic promises
• you stick to the facts
• you are careful about making negative social comparisons
• you see it as a temporary condition which will pass

However, we advise you to be prepared to handle some personal feelings of your own, such as anxiety, guilt, shame and anger.

You are in a vulnerable situation. Therefore, you should make sure that this vulnerability does not get mixed up with the facts:

• Even though you are feeling inadequate, you are not inadequate!
• Even though you expect punishment and criticism, you might not get it. Stop criticising yourself.
• Perhaps you don't feel that you are entitled to be tired and less energetic. But tiredness and lack of energy are part of your illness.
• Finally, remember that bad or unfortunate things happen without it being your fault!

Remember your boss is a human being too. He or she will have at some point in their life felt sadness, sorrow, pain and a difficult life. He or she will understand when you explain things as they are. But never say anything that you do not feel secure in saying.