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Loneliness

A page in the diary "To forget"
Written by MightyJoe 25 February 2010 04:22

No matter how many times people around you tell you that you're not lonely, they're lying. They don't know what you went through. They think they know. But in fact, they know nuts. The pain, the agony, the sorrow, the mania, the depression, the heat, the rage, the crying spells, the rainy days.

There are people out there who tell you to buck up, that you're not alone, that you're not the only one going through shit, cheer up!, etc.

I made a mental note to myself to defend against all these irresponsible comments.

I think i'm gonna lose my home and family soon.

Have mercy on me.

Comments from the community

Hi MightyJoe

I have to agree to a large extent with what you are saying here. Cos I'm going through a similar stage.

However, when I pause to think a bit more, I also know that what they say is not completely wrong, all the time.

What matters to those who feel like you, could perhaps be the personal human touch. Their reasoning is correct, but they lack the personal human touch, they lack in making sustained efforts to connect with you, to show their sincerity, compassion and empathy. There is hardly any long-term show of human warmth in the form of various actions to complement those words of warning, admonishment etc.

You can lose hope in all human beings, but please do not lose hope in helping yourself to feel happy and peaceful.

When you are suffering, you think or know you are alone in suffering. How long will this continue? It is anyone's guess.

Is loneliness something that we are doomed to suffer at throughout our lives?

Depending on how you interpret this question, you will take different actions to help yourself or burden yourself further.

What will it be for you or me? Or people like us?

Take care, MightyJoe.

Written by nw4m, 25 February 2010 10:18

I worry, think, care, fear too much. What I'm not is that i don't trust too much. In fact, I don't trust at all.

I am not doomed with loneliness.

I am born with it.

Written by MightyJoe, 25 February 2010 11:16

If one is born with loneliness, then does that mean nothing will or can change for the better?

If one is born with loneliness, then why does one feel painful? Why should we feel painful about something that is painful in nature?

Written by nw4m, 25 February 2010 12:10

If one is born with loneliness, then does that mean nothing will or can change for the better? (No matter how hard you try, you can never beat life.)

If one is born with loneliness, then why does one feel painful? Why should we feel painful about something that is painful in nature? ( You used the word "we". It sort of hint that you agree with me, that most dep ppl are born with it but you're trying to change your that. The word "loneliness" is often over-exaggerated nowadays. However, the taste of it, the duration, the degree, the extent of prominence, can never percieved by anyone else but yourself. Pain is the consequential of loneliness.

Written by MightyJoe, 25 February 2010 21:44

I'm in the process of searching for answers within. So I'm posing a question in relation to your views about loneliness.

I used the word 'we' to mean that we could be going through similar experiences, having similar feelings and I'm trying to understand your views and feelings better.

I can roughly understand a little about your comments on pain and loneliness, but the question is do you believe or think pain and loneliness is something that we can't change (since you seem to be certain it is something certain people are born with?)

It seems to me that you are trying to say loneliness and pain cannot be avoided nor changed in any way, whether we wish to or not, since certain people are born with it as you have described. Do correct me if I have misunderstood your message.

Written by nw4m, 26 February 2010 10:39

Tricky question. If i say "Yes", then it'll mean, i can't change my beliefs & thinking and that is why i can't change my life.

Give me 10 years, i will have improvements, provided that i'm still alive. But i will still always be susceptible to further episodes. I will always still be trying to manage and manage and manage and manage myself.

Why are we healing and the rest of the people are out there brimming of hopes and potential?

Written by MightyJoe, 27 February 2010 00:48

at least u are healing by sharing ur thoughts. ur train of thought is very simple - get out of ur shell and be open to new experiences and u will not feel lonely.

although all of us are born as individuals except twins born in a pair and hence dont experience loneliness, eirhter u are happy or not happy with this state .

if u feel being alone is wrong then there is pain due to the wrong mindset. if u feel that being alone is right then there is no pain to it. its all up to how u see things.

Written by cheerful, 27 February 2010 04:28

'Why are we healing and the rest of the people are out there brimming of hopes and potential?'

Good question. Please share your thoughts with us when you have found your own answers.

Written by nw4m, 27 February 2010 09:59

I am not healing when sharing here! Even sharing with others does not help. I always feel irritated and exhausted after sharing. People around you are just curious. They wanna listen to your "interesting" story, then they'll try to give you abit of their "expert" life experiences, then you'll hear no more from them. I'll never want to share anymore to anyone.

Sharing brings burden. Burden brings choice. Choice brings division.

nw4m, that question is open to all. I have no answer/s. Please share yours.

Written by MightyJoe, 27 February 2010 19:06

I have similar experiences too with sharing. I can relate to a large extent. I'm still encountering such incidents with sharing.

The question is I'm not super sure if I'm indeed healing by sharing; I mean I could be deluding myself. So indeed your question is open to all.

I'm only asking that should anyone think they have found their answers, do share their thoughts and feelings here with the community. You are free to decide whether to share or not, when, with who and how much to share.

When I do find those answers, I will definitely share them with anyone who's sincere about using them to help themselves and others.

Written by nw4m, 27 February 2010 20:12

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